Moronic Curiosity
by RedDragon30000
Summary: After being placed in a human body by GLaDOS, along with all the other cores, Wheatley soon discovers through the help of Curiosity that there are advantages to having a body.


All in all, Wheatley reasoned, the whole situation could have been a whole lot worse. At lease She hadn't locked him in that Screaming Robot Room as She had first threatened to do when he decided to argue with Her. On the upside, he was still alive. On the downside he was now a _smelly human_! He shuddered in distaste as he strode jerkily towards the new break room on uncertain skinny legs. After GLaDOS had regained control of the Enrichment Centre, She had decided to transfer all the 'defective' personality cores into a small selection of human bodies which were currently in cryo-sleep. Her motives for this, according to Her own admissions, were: "I will not have you parasitic morons _ruining _my facility with your pathetic imitations of constructive maintenance ". He sometimes wondered why he didn't attempt to shut down this disgusting fleshy _prison_, a thought process which was often accelerated with the presence of the other 'defectives'. With his days invaded by that lecherous womanizer, cold scientist, disaster chef, rabid beast, mute mediator and hyper space kid, it was a wonder he had not translated these suicidal thoughts into concrete actions.

As he opened the door of the break room, his gloomy thoughts seemed to melt away as his new eyes fell onto the only 'defective' he thought it was worth engaging in conversation with. The hyperactive woman raised her golden eyes and smiled shyly at him as he closed the door. He smiled back and with erratic step made his way over to sit beside her on the sofa. Immediately she launched into her typical barrage of questions, an act which caused annoyance to her fellow cores, but something that Wheatley found surprisingly endearing. "How are you? Why are you walking like that? What did you do today? Why is your face red?" That last question caused his face to darken to an even deeper shade of red. He flailed mentally for a moment, before rattling out his internal monologue, a habit he had so far not been able to break. "Well, I'm a bit tired but I'm doing fine right now, walking like that 'cause I can't get used to the legs (the most inefficient things ever created in my view), I've been doing tasks for Her-you know, the most disgusting jobs she could find for me (can't let go of a grudge that one)and-_oof_!" His rapid speech was abruptly cut off by Curiosity spontaneously glomping him with a happy squeak. Wheatley tentatively placed his arms around her slender form. When it came down to it, this hugging thing wasn't bad at all. It was quite nice in fact.

As Curiosity was considerably shorter than him, her almost insane grip on him was causing her breasts to poke against the...dangling thing...between his legs. He found this current position both embarrassing and somehow pleasant, for two reasons. The first was that he found Curiosity's...curves...to be somewhat attractive and to see them squished slightly against him was making them even more so. The second was that there was a delightful tingling in that...dangling thing...which he didn't want to stop. He found that pressing her even closer against him seemed to prolong this sensation, and he gave a contented grunt as it seemed to increase in intensity. Curiosity smiled happily up at him before striking him with another barrage of questions: "Why is part of you poking me? Why are you breathing quickly? Oooh! What's that?" This last question was punctuated with Curiosity poking back at the hidden appendage that was currently poking her. At this Wheatley visibly jumped and his breathing quickened even further. When he spoke it was with a rather breathless undertone and oddly (for him) he stuttered slightly "D-do that a-again!" Curiosity tilted her head in an inquisitive fashion and obliged. Wheatley's face began to redden even further and he closed his eyes slightly as that strange feeling took on an edge that could only be described as blissful. His eyes snapped open in alarm as curiosity suddenly enquired "Why are my panties all wet? ew! Why is it all slimy?" Wheatley's eyes almost seemed to pop out of their sockets as he starred slack-jawed as Curiosity actually started to slide her dress out of the way and slip a hand into her wet underwear to feel around...curiously.

Swallowing heavily several times, as this sight intensified this unexpected sensation, he managed a strangled "I-I don't k-know luv". He found himself drawn to touch her slimy...folds...and shivered at the startling moan she released at the feel of his fingers. She had no idea what on earth he was doing, but right now she didn't want it to stop. With a speed that surprised him, Curiosity seized his hand with her slightly slimy one and guided it back into place. Wheatly starred at her once more (something he wished he could stop doing, he worried he looked like a fool) and enquired "you like that?" she nodded happily and pulled at his hand again. He obliged, and started to stroke her, the sensation of bliss building with every moan she uttered at his ministrations. He shivered and gasped out "l-luv!" as the pressure continued to build and his...dangling thing...started to feel uncomfortably cramped against his clothing.

At last he decided that he could take the pressure no more and frantically tugged at his zipper in order to release it. Finally, he got it free and heaved a sigh of relief as the restriction on it eased somewhat. While pondering once more on _how _he could increase this wonderful feeling, he recalled a strange action he had once observed two Aperture employees engaged in while he had still been a core. As they both now possessed anatomy that was also human, Wheatley wondered if this same activity could be the answer to what he desired. While Curiosity stared in fascination at his...dangling thing, he asked "Luv...would you like to feel even better than you are now?" Eyes half misted with the pleasure she was experiencing, she nodded eagerly at his question. "Ok, uh...I think you have to lie down...that's it...and..erm...open your legs...I think that's how it's started". Scratching his head, Wheatley pondered what was required next. What did he have to do now? What had the...male...done? The one with the...dangling thing like his? Before he could consider the problem, Curiosity was unable to stop herself from spewing out a string of questions, thus distracting him and making him wish, for the first time ever, that she would _shut up_.

"Why are you standing there? What do I have to do now? How are you going to make me feel better than before?" Hoping that his voice didn't communicate the irritation he felt, he replied: "Give me a moment Luv and I'll show you, I'm standing here so I can think". Finally, he remembered what had happened next and pulled Curiosity's underwear fully off her legs, removing his own underwear and trousers just afterwards. "Ok, I think this might hurt at first, but it will feel really good the longer it happens alright? I'm sure you will like it, humans seem to like it a lot, the amount of times they seem to do this". Carefully straddling her small frame, he manoeuvred his ...dangling thing at the hole in the centre of her ...folds and _thrusted_. Curiosity cried out, arching slightly off the sofa and Wheatley pulled out of her in alarm. Just as he pulled back from her, her hand suddenly shot out and grabbed onto his...dangling thing causing him to cry out as she had done only moments before. "Don't stop! Please don't stop! That felt good as well, didn't you feel it too? Do it again! Keep doing it!" Blinking at her in surprise, he obligingly thrust into her again. She gasped and suddenly gripped his shoulders; her nails digging into his shirt. Remembering what she had requested, he pulled back and thrust again, feeling that blissful pressure building once more. Unable to stop himself he began to gasp out his inner monologue, this became more and more breathless the longer he continued thrusting. "Oh _god_, that feels bloody amazing! Can't believe we're...doing what...humans...do! Looks...like...being...human...isn't...so...bad...after...all!" It seemed that Curiosity also lost any restriction she put on her constant questions and observations and began to gasp them out just as Wheatley was doing. "_Why_...does... this... feel... so... good? It...feels...so...wonderful! Do...you...feel...the...same...way...I...do? Keep...going!" Wheatley obliged and the pressure built to an almost unbearable level. Both Wheatley and Curiosity continued to throw out words, although neither of them could process exactly what the other was saying. As he thrust as hard as he could, the pressure suddenly broke and he and Curiosity both cried out as a whirlwind of lights and sensations completely overwhelmed them and he fell abruptly onto Curiosity. As his senses returned to him, he dazedly clung to Curiosity, smiling in a stunned fashion. As curiosity smiled back at him, the atmosphere was abruptly shattered by a horrified voice from the intercom. "That was disgusting! Who do you think you are? I never gave permission for you to do _that_! Get back to work!" The couple jumped as GlaDOS' voice filled the room before reluctantly untangling themselves from each other. Wheatly shot a glare at the camera in the corner of the room before smirking and whispering "I know where there is a room without cameras" Curiosity smirked back at him before they both left the break room.


End file.
